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Sunday, June 08, 2008

Now I'm giving away a copy of Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children by Allison Bottke (non-fiction)

To enter to win a copy of this book simply post a comment about why you want to read it. That's it! Easy as pie. I will pick a winner on Wednesday. And as usual, don't forget to leave me a way to contact you if you win!

About the book:

This important and compassionate new book from the creator of the successful God Allows U-Turns series will help parents and grandparents of the many adult children who continue to make life painful for their loved ones.

Writing from firsthand experience, Allison identifies the lies that kept her, and ultimately her son in bondage—and how she overcame them. Additional real life stories from other parents are woven through the text.

A tough–love book to help readers cope with dysfunctional adult children, Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children will empower families by offering hope and healing through S.A.N.I.T.Y.—a six–step program to help parents regain control in their homes and in their lives.

S = STOP Enabling, STOP Blaming Yourself, and STOP the Flow of Money
A = Assemble a Support Group
N = Nip Excuses in the Bud
I = Implement Rules/Boundaries
T = Trust Your Instincts
Y = Yield Everything to God

My review:

There are many, many helpful non-fiction books in this world to choose from, but this is one that every parent MUST read. It's incredibly well-written and interesting, and the examples are excellent. Since I've worked with dysfunctional people and families for twenty years as a social worker, I can testify that Allison knows what she is talking about. She's obviously poured her heart and soul into this book in order to help families, and I've not found better advice out there for people who have adult children than is mentioned here. In fact, I brought it to church with me to a Bible study as I was reading it. People were checking it out because everyone knows someone who has an adult child who has torn their parents' hearts out by the way they live their lives. The awesome thing about this book is that the advice will actually work, painful as it will be. It's scripturally sound advice. Allison makes an impressive case as you'll see when you read the book.

There is even a benefit to reading this book while your kids are still young, or teenagers. They don't have to be fully grown children for you to benefit as a reader. Why? Because you can stop destructive patterns BEFORE you let them destroy your children. I've pondered some things about my own parenting style as a result of this book and it's sparked some great discussions with my husband. We are doing a lot of things right, but there are always ways to improve. Like making sure your own childhood deficits don't interfere with what God is trying to work in your child's life. My boys are 15 and 16 and Setting Boundaries for Your Adult Children has actually helped me with some decisions I need to make as they grow older. I feel so much more equipped. Bless Allison for opening her heart and making herself vulnerable for the sake of the ministry God has given her. This book is a winner!

Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children by Allison Bottke was published by Harvest House and released in Feb. 2008.


Anonymous said...

Well, I would really love to have this book simply because I NEED it. I can't go into details ... just that I really need this book.

Thank you for the opportunity to maybe recieve it and for this ministry you have of giving away books that fit the needs of so many.

Pat Guy

windycindy said...

Happy Monday! I have read reviews on this book and it is so appropriate for this time in my life. Our oldest son had lived away at school this last year. It was out of state, but now he has returned home for the summer and is going to school back here. He will be living with his. We still give him our curfew and other rules. Please enter me in your book drawing. I appreciate it.....

Lalycairn said...

Oh my. What a timely addition this would be. My nineteen year old has recently moved back home, after two years of college - and what a ride it's been. She's going to be moving out again in 6 weeks. I'm not sure I'll last. I hate to say it. Sanity. . .I'll have to remember that.

Anonymous said...

This sounds like a great book. Finding that boundry line would help this household immensely.

Smilingsal said...

The first letter of the plan, "s" sounds like it'd be of help for me to read and apply.

Anonymous said...

wow! you know my relationship how it went with my kids, l would love to read this! since we are now haveing a wonderful relationship! Percy...

Anonymous said...

I have twin 14 year olds and this looks like a must have book.

Kendra said...

This would be the perfect gift for my mother. Tough love, but the long-term rewards will be great. (I'd read this, too, so to avoid the pitfalls that I see in my own relatives)

Anonymous said...

It is heartening to read others' comments and know that I am not alone. Our college junior son is beginning to fail his classes, moving in with his girlfriend, and still expects us to pay for everything. I think we really need this book!

kaylee8 said...

This would be a great one to have on hand with 3 teens and one pre-teen in the house! It would be used for a long time to come.

carolyn said...

This book looks like a must have for most Christian

calgirl said...

I want to read this book because my son is turning 17 and we are trying hard to make him independant but he can be a procrastinator and gets afraid when having to make lots of choices at once. I do not want to have my son grow up like my brother who is in his 40s and still at home.

Swtlilchick said...

This book is speaking to me.I
have a 23 year old and a 20 year
old.Sometimes it is hard letting
them make their own decisions.
I am overly protective and get
into trouble because of this.One
of them is very strong willed so
we butt heads quite abit.Thanks
for the contest

Michelle said...

And the winner is... (sorry anonymous, but I didn't even put you down--either of you--because you didn't leave a NAME or any way to contact you) Back to the winner...


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